How I Got Here, Part 2

Reading The Mission of Motherhood, I understood for the first time that my children are my greatest blessings and there is no higher calling or more important job than raising my disciples. I don't need to leave my house in order to do ministry. Everyday, in the way I serve, teach, and train my children, I am investing in disciples for Christ. This does not mean that our call to evangelize the lost is belittled, but those who say that moms of littles can't do ministry are missing the point entirely.

When I understood that raising my disciples for the Lord Jesus was my most important calling, then my view of working changed completely. Suddenly, I understood what a terrible thing I was doing by allowing others to spend more time and thus have more influence over the children the Lord had given to me.

Having decided that I didn't want to delegate my parenting to someone else, even for a few hours of each day, it wasn't a stretch for me to see that sending my kids off to school each day was to do the same thing. I would once again be delegating my job to someone else, so that they could spend more time, have more influence, and ultimately disciple my children. All so that my children could be taught by "the experts". But experts in what? There is no one more expert on my children than me. I know how they think. I understand their weaknesses and strengths. So my only obstacle was in finding curriculum to teach them. I didn't realize how easy that task would become.

To be continued again. . .

Go Get This Book

I picked up this book at the library yesterday and we could hardly wait to read it after I'd flipped through a couple of pages. Very cute book with a hilarious ending.
Check it out!

Me Time

I do not need time to myself in order to be a good mother. In fact, selflessness is the whole point of mothering. However, I have nothing against spending some occasional time away from my children. For instance, twice a month I get together with other homeschool moms for coffee and dessert. We all feed our hubbies and kids and then disappear, leaving the daddies in charge of bedtime. You can't convince me that I should feel some type of guilt for leaving my children with their daddy. Most of the time though, I get my social time in while my children are with me. I'll meet with a friend or two and we'll chit chat for a couple of hours while our kids play together. I'm very picky about who I do this with, in order to guard the influence my children are around.

Once a week, we have a date night swap. One week, we babysit; the next week, we have a date. Kyle and I also have frequent home dates, when we send the kids upstairs to play together while we have a date in the living room. We may order out and enjoy our dinner just the two of us or we may just sit and have tea and dessert together. Not even the kids' occasional cries of how much they want to be with us make us feel guilty for our date nights. Our marriage is the most important aspect of our parenting.

I did feel guilty for leaving my children with people I didn't really know in order to go to work though, and I only worked part-time. God has not called me to be the provider for my family. He has called me to be a keeper at home. While my salary gave us more financial freedom, I found it very unfulfilling to be outside God's perfect plan for moms.

Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, ⁴and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, ⁵to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.
-Titus 2:3

How I Got Here, Part 1

When Elena and Chloe were little, all my friends were talking about educational choices for their kids. It was the new hot topic. I had planned to work part-time, so the girls could go to a Christian school. (Back then, we had 2 kids with no plans for any more.) I laughed when people suggested homeschooling. I wasn't one of those moms who enjoyed being with my kids all day; how could I possibly have the patience to homeschool them??

I had a very hard time adjusting to being the mother of two. In fact, it was so hard for me, I went back to work so that I could put them in Mother's Day Out. I needed some Me Time! I just knew some time away each day would help me adjust.

But it didn't. It made it worse. When I was at work, I was thinking about my kids and when I was at home, I was thinking about my duties at work. I was never fully engaged in either.

Then a mentor friend gave me a copy of The Mission of Motherhood and I began to understand for the first time the value of motherhood and the blessing of my children. Kyle and I decided that I should quit work and stay at home with my girls. It took time, but being fully engaged at home allowed me to adjust to motherhood and I became more commited to my role as mother.

To be continued. . .

Which Comes First: The College or the Wedding?

I mentioned in a recent blog post that the concept of waiting to have kids until you've been married several years is a crock. It's selfishness; it has nothing to do with creating a strong foundation. Children make us holy, because they strip away our selfishness. That's a good thing.
But let's back up to the wedding. I have seen so many young Christians in love who are told to wait until they have finished college before they get married. What do we communicate to our children when we say that? We are letting them know that we place more value on their careers than their marriages. I've been listening to this fantastic sermon by Voddie Baucham. He gives a great analogy for the temptation we put our children in when we devalue marriage. King Solomon fell into sexual sin; King David fell into sexual sin; and Samson fell into sexual sin. Do we really expect our children to stay in a commited relationship for a couple of years while they finish college, when it will require them to be wiser than Solomon , more godly than King David, and stronger than Samson??
The Bible says, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord." (Proverbs 18:22) The same favor is not promised to those who postpone marriage to pursue a college degree. Do we teach our children to be temporally-minded when we communicate to them that their degrees are more important than their marriages?

It's a Girl Thing

Something tells me this girl's gonna grow up and marry a really good listener.

Money Hungry

Yesterday our washer stopped spinning. Not wanting our laundry to back up before we have it fixed, I decided I'd rather go to the laundromat. So, I asked Maya & Isaac (the only money-motivated children in this house) if they had any quarters. Isaac said that he had plenty, so I told him I could trade his quarters for dollars.
So he asks: But how many quarters for a dollar?
I said: Well, how many quarters are in a dollar?
You should have seen his face deflate as he realized I was going to do an even trade.

In true Isaac fashion, he held up 2 fingers and said, disappointingly: Four quarters.